Washington Divorce & Parenting: 101

1. Filing & Service — One party files a Petition and serves the other. This legally begins the matter. For Divorce cases, Washington has a mandatory 90-day waiting period before a case can be finalized.
2. Temporary Orders (if needed) — Short-term decisions about parenting time, financial support, and living arrangements while the case is pending. This provides an opportunity for the court to provide stability, while a more long-term plan can be developed or analyzed.
3. Information Exchange — Both sides exchange required financial information so issues like support and property division can be evaluated fairly. This is called discovery. I know most procedural dramas on television make is appear like an attorney or witness says new and damaging information in court that ruins the other party's position, in the real world it typically does not work like this. The parties conduct discovery by propounding devices, such as interrogatories and request for production (which are fancy ways of saying questions and documents that support the answers to the question), on the other party. This process allows the requesting party to know the other party's position for court or mediation.
4. Mediation / Settlement — Most cases resolve here. Agreements reached through negotiation or mediation are formalized into final parenting plans, support orders, and property divisions. In this phase the parties are able to provide offers that can be modified and agreed to without court intervention. I tell clients that mediation allows them to determine the outcome, whereas if we have to go to court the person in the black robe makes the final decision.
5. Final Orders — If agreements are reached, they are submitted to the court. If not, a judge decides the unresolved issues based on what is just and equitable under Washington law.

• Do I have to prove fault? No — Washington is a no-fault state.

• How is parenting time decided? Courts look at stability, past involvement, and the child(ren)'s best interest.

• Will I have to appear in court? Most cases involve limited court appearances; many issues resolve outside the courtroom..

• Can orders change later? Yes — parenting plans and support orders can be modified if circumstances change substantially.

• Posting Emotionally Online — Understandable, but risky. Posts can escalate conflict, undermine credibility, and be used against you by the other party in the matter.

• Hiding Assets or Information — This is unlawful, easily uncovered, and often leads to worse outcomes.

• Refusing Mediation — Avoiding mediation dramatically increases costs and conflict. Trials are expensive and emotionally taxing, which is why most cases settle well before that stage.

• Putting Children in the Middle — This is never appropriate. It increases harm to children and negatively affects how courts view your parental judgment.